If you follow me on Instagram, then you already know that I went on a shopping trip this past weekend with my mom and sister. Honestly, our all-day trips to the mall (the laughter… the bargain hunting… the window shopping… the eating) are some of my most treasured moments with them. It’s about so much more than just finding a new pair of shoes or a cute new top. (Not that there’s anything wrong with finding a new pair of shoes or a cute new top). 😉
But honestly, it really is all about the food.
It’s about the quality time, of course. (But seriously, we eat a lot when we shop together).
My main focus for this particular trip was to find a few winter maternity tops. But that didn’t stop me from window-shopping and browsing the jewelry sections, when my mom and sister shopped in stores that sold clothes not quite suitable for my growing bump. I’m never against looking at pretty things! And I’m still at the stage where I can fit into flowy tops that aren’t maternity. (Remember how I was going to start wearing maternity clothes on December 1st? Ha, ha. I pushed out the date, because I found a few more loose tops that I can wear. I’m holding off as long as possible).
My mom and I were sitting outside a waiting room door at a clothing store while my sister Sarah tried on an outfit, when one of the clerks came to ask if Sarah needed anything. Sarah had opened up the door just then and showed us the stylish, gray dress. She looked adorable!
When she had closed the door again, the clerk whispered to me and my mom, “What size is she? A 2? Anything looks good on someone that skinny.” She shook her head in disgust. “We chunky girls have to make due with what we can, am I right?”
I literally had the hardest time keeping the look of shock off my face. Like I’m fairly certain that my jaw hit the floor, which is a good thing because it kept me from replying.
Chunky? Chunky?!? My mom is skinnier than me OR my sister. And I personally prefer to be called curvaceous. Or you can call me a healthy woman who is 4 1/2 months pregnant. That works too… But CHUNKY?
I mean, I ate a salad for lunch!
Granted, I ate it with a side of cheeseburger and fries, but – hey – I’m eating for two now. Cut a girl some slack.
I was personally unshaken by what she said, but – at the same time – I was beyond irritated. I think it was mainly the way she said it… I’m a huge proponent of loving our bodies, no matter its shape and size, and focusing on health. But there’s such a negative connotation that comes with “fat”, “huge,” and “chunky.”
Well, unless, we’re talking about Chunky Monkey icecream from Ben and Jerry’s, in which case ‘chunky’ is a pretty awesome thing.
Honestly, my sister and I leave this particular store with similar experiences every time. A clerk always feels they have the right to comment on our bodies. (Last time, my sister got the negative feedback, if you can believe that). I’m not quite sure why we still go in there, hoping to find an adorable, bargain outfit. We always leave irritated with the fact that an employee felt they had the right to give us a very unnecessary (and unwanted) opinion about our shapes or weight.
It just saddens, irritates, and frustrates me that we women can so easily put ourselves down. And put each other down. And see each other in a negative light, whether we’re a size 2. Or a size 8. Or a size 12.
Why does it have to come down to body size and shape? Beauty is so much deeper than our skin. (And if we are going to talk about our appearances for a moment, who holds the right to decide what is beautiful and what isn’t? Are we going to base our opinion of beauty on photo-shopped models and actresses from Hollywood?).
It’s time we started to embrace our individual beauty, not only accepting it for ourselves but also encouraging the same outlook in others. We women need to stand together and lift each other up!
Have you ever had a similar experience where a sales clerk thought she had the right to comment on your body in a negative light?
And do you think that I should do a clothing haul? I found some really cute things! 🙂