1. Your house exists in three stages – messy, messier, and oh-my-gosh-we-live-in-a-barn.
2. The messy version of your house starts to feel clean, because it’s only messy. There are two much worse levels…
3. You realize that there are benefits to the toys scattered about your living room floor. It distracts visitors from your crazy hair and the bags under your eyes. “Oops, I’m sorry there are so many lego’s scattered about. Why don’t you carefully watch your feet and try not to look at my face too much…”
4. You’ve got mom guns and can lift a 30 lb toddler while carrying groceries, talking on the phone, and dodging pets. America Ninja Warrior has nothing on you.
5. You’re really good at picking up stuffed animals with your feet. (Anything to avoid doing one more squat while holding your little one… who – for the record – doesn’t feel all that little anymore).
6. You wear leopard print, not because it makes you look fierce, but because the pattern hides milk stains, chocolate stains, poop stains, Popsicle stains, and gravy stains. Leopard print is the ultimate stain hider. It’s like precious gold in cloth form.
7. If you close your eyes, you can see spots.
8. Forget heels, polish, lip gloss, and jewelry. Your epitome of THE perfect night is now a hot bath, bubbles, flickering candlelight, and a bowl of peanut m&m’s. Ahhh, feel that stress slip away…
9. If you don’t have time for the hot bath, bubbles, or flickering candlelight, then the peanut m&m’s will do!
10. Caffeine is your best friend. You love it even more than you love leopard print. Or m&m’s even!
You have more love in your heart than you know what to do with. 🙂