I’m Preggo and I Know It

Most people are telling me that my belly is still pretty tiny, considering the fact that I’ll be having a baby in two months. I take encouragement in that, hoping that the munchkin will be on the small side.  😉  But then there’s also the chance that I’m just a late bloomer, and my body is preparing to expand faster than you can say, “She’s going to blow!”

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Of course, not everyone tells me that I’m still looking small…

If you’ve read my blog for any small amount of time, then you know just how amazing my hubby Nate is. Seriously, I hit the jackpot with him!  Although he’s not perfect and undoubtedly male (which comes with its own set of quirks), he’s absolutely perfect for me.  And he’s one of the kindest, sweetest, most considerate bacon-and-donut-loving guys I’ve ever met.

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That being said, he’s also the most literal, scientific-oriented person I’ve ever met (which maybe just comes with being male, I don’t know). I remember back in the day, a girlfriend would talk about how uncomfortable her monthly cramps were, and Nate – overhearing – would start to explain to her just why her body was feeling the way it was.  The girlfriend would stare at him with dumbfounded eyes, refusing to believe that this guy was talking to her about her Menstruation cycle (since guys are supposed to be freaked out about that sort of thing).

But, yeah, not Nate. Nate wanted to go into biology at one point in his life, and he thinks that anything to do with science or the human body is fascinating.

So when he smiles at me proudly and tells me that my belly looks huge, he actually really means, “Wow, you’re growing a baby, and that’s just so amazing.  I’m so excited that your belly is so cute and round right now.”

But what I hear is, “Wow, your belly is huge.”  And if looks could kill, he’d at least walk away with a black eye.  (I mean, I love him and all.  But a pregnant woman can’t always be responsible for her hormonal-influenced actions.  And pretty much everyone else knows that you should never include the words ‘you’  and ‘huge’ together in a sentence when talking to a woman who is pregnant).

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So I just glare at him and shove another apple-cider donut into my mouth, because that’s honestly the cure for anything and everything these days. (Gosh, they’re so good)!


 

Oh, and then there was the older woman who is an acquaintance of mine, although I don’t know her well…

“Look whose belly has popped!” she gushed, focusing in on my belly. Her hands reached out as though my stomach was a giant magnet, and she was made of steel.  She rubbed her hands in a circular motion around my stomach for a moment; and before I had the chance to respond, she stuck out her pointer finger.  She pressed it into the lower-portion of my belly until it gently slid right into my belly-button.

“Oh, look, you still have an inny!” she gushed, her face lighting up into a smile.

I just stood there in complete shock, trying to process; as I faced this woman who I hardly knew. We just stood there a moment, connected by her finger sticking into my belly-button (which – for the record – is getting more and more shallow by the day.  But, yes, it’s still an inny).  I had absolutely no idea how to address this particular awkward moment, so I kind of just giggled nervously until the woman pulled back her finger and changed the topic of conversation to something else, like the weather.

Awkward moment!  Where are the cider donuts??


 

Oh, and then there was the complete stranger at the shoe-store…

I was minding my own business, trying to find a comfortable pair of shoes to wear with a maternity dress I had purchased, when a female shopper (about my mom’s age) asked me when I was due. I told her… She smiled a moment…

Then her face glazed over into something fierce as she hissed to me, “Labor is going to hurt!”

I was taken aback, but I just smiled nervously in reply and said, “Oh, I’m sure!”

“Oh, you’re not sure,” she responded, shaking her head viciously.  “Trust me.  You’re not sure.   It is the most severe pain that you can imagine!  I’m talking SEVERE”

My smile is starting to be replaced with something else. More like a deer in headlights look.  “Yeahhhh, I’m trying to prepare myself.”

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“Oh, nothing can prepare you! Nothing!  I had my child 21 years ago, and I remember that pain as though it were yesterday.  I never had another kid.  It was just SO bad!!!”

I swallowed nervously, said something awkward like ‘thank you’, grabbed the shoes (which I bought in a rush and had to return two days later), and then hurried to the cash register.

Get me out of here, and fast!!!


 

Yes, I’m pregnant and I know it! Most days, that’s a good thing!!  But sometimes, it comes with its own set of awkwardness and a little bit of frustration.  Sometimes, it feels like there must be a hidden camera, and I’m living on the set of a reality TV show.  But most times, I’m just left laughing to myself and with a really good story to tell.  🙂

So… it’s all good (until the day comes when I can’t hold my preggo self back, and I go all crazy on someone).  Nate, being his usual literal self, says he hopes he’s there to witness it, because he thinks it’d be kind of funny to see his usually calm wife go preggo-crazy.  I told him that if he keeps calling my belly huge, well, he has nothing to worry about.  He’ll see that side of me first-hand.  😉  Ha, ha!!

Have you had an awkard moment lately?

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22 thoughts on “I’m Preggo and I Know It”

    1. Ha! People ‘are’ weird… and awkward… 😉 I’m learning to just laugh at such situations instead of freak out about them, because I think that – for the most part – people do mean well. 🙂 Sometimes, it’s just not easy for the pregnant lady. Ha, ha.

  1. Nate is special. haha. But I love that you share about him so we can get to know him better! Maybe you can provide him with a list of acceptable comments he can use, including “say nothing, just smile lovingly.”

    Perhaps you’d like to hire me as your full-time belly guard? I will be sure people keep their poking, prodding, and stupid comments to a minimum. Most likely zero. I put people in their place. I think the boys find it both endearing and embarrassing. haha. (Last month I scolded grown men at a Dirty Girl mud run for SMOKING right along the course… as we are there RUNNING for breast CANCER. John was amused yet pulled me away so we didn’t get beat up haha). I’m sure you could still find other reasons to eat donuts 🙂

    1. LOL! Good idea! I’ll have to make Nate that list now, so he knows what to say. 😉 At the very heart of who he is, I love what he really means, when he says that my tummy is big. I know that – in his mind – I shouldn’t be insecure about a big belly in the very least, because it’s a beautiful thing. So to him, he’s telling me that I look pregnant, which is an amazing and wonderful thing… But to me – being female – I still just hear ‘big belly’, and it makes me shudder. So I guess he has to learn how to compliment me, and I need to learn that having a big ol’ belly while pregnant is nothing to be ashamed about in the least… even if the word ‘big’ is associated with it. Ha, ha. 🙂
      And, yes, I would most definitely like to hire you as my full-time belly guard! How much do you charge in peanut butter cups and sprinkles?

  2. I totally dig your husbands love for biology! The human body is SO fascinating, though I am definitely on your side with the huge comments haha. Also, that woman at the shoes store…NO! She needs a slap on the wrist haha. People need to just cool it sometimes.

    1. Ha, ha! Thank you! 😉 Although I agree, my husband’s love of biology is pretty awesome. And in his mind, when he says ‘big belly’, he’s referring to my very pregnant belly, which he sees as beautiful and absolutely nothing to be ashamed about. So while I still shudder at the term ‘big’ and can’t ever like it, I do see that it’s a cultural thing we females struggle with. I really shouldn’t hate his ‘compliments’ so much, because he’s referring to a belly that’s growing and carrying a life. So I know that – at the heart of him -he means only good things when he comments on my big ol’ belly. But still, as I said, I shudder a bit and just can’t like it. Ha ha! So we’re both learning, I suppose… 😉
      But that woman in the shoe store? I agree, she definitely needs a slap on the wrist. Ha, ha! There was absolutely no need for her to freak out like that and warn me about the severe pains of labor. She definitely needed to take a chill-pill for sure! LOL~

  3. Oh dear…people can be so thoughtless and even cruel when you are pregnant. The worst comments I actually heard last pregnancy and some were so bad I can’t even repeat them!! I can’t believe she poked your belly button!

    I think your husband and mine would get along!! My husband is also completely not freaked out by biology and menstrual cycles, much to the chagrin of his girlfriends. I was unfazed, since my mom was a midwife and this talk was pretty standard for me.

    1. Okay, so our husbands would officially get along just fine! Ha, ha. I’ve yet to meet another guy who is so scientific and nonchalant about such things. 🙂
      And people really can be thoughtless. I think there’s a mix of people who mean well… and people who have been through things and feel as though they now can belittle anyone else who hasn’t yet.

  4. Oh my gosh. People have no shame. A finger to the bellybutton??? No. No. No. Not appropriate. And a perfect stranger talking about how horrible labor is going to be? Is that necessary? No. No.

    But your husband is a keeper. Even when he uses “you” and “huge” in the same sentence. 🙂 (YOU look fantastic, you’re growing a miracle, and it is a very exciting time!)

    1. I agree! No, No, NO! Ha, ha.
      And I agree about my hubby too. He IS a keeper! 🙂 And I love how he really does find my big ol’ belly to be beautiful, even if his ‘compliments’ sometimes make me upset (because he uses the word ‘big’). Ha, ha.

  5. So, here’s the problem. We keep perpetuating this idea that childbirth is the most excruciating thing that a person can experience. That it’s completely unbearable. That you’ll never make it through the process and you should be terrified.
    This idea is completely absurd.
    When we only focus on childbirth as a painful experience that our bodies and minds won’t be able to handle then, guess what, we won’t be able to handle it.

    Childbirth is a beautiful and natural experience that will connect you to your child. Labour created hormones in your body that relax you and your muscles and literally make you fall in love with your baby.

    A woman’s body is made to bear children and to give birth. Think of your mother, your grandmother, your great-grandmother and your entire line of maternal ancestry that have experienced labour. They were made for this, as were you. Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise.

    1. Best… Comment… Ever! I feel as though I should print this out and hang it on my fridge. OR, better yet, print it out and put it in my hospital bag so that I can read it at the hospital.
      I agree, labor is a beautiful thing, and the female body is designed for it. And it might be painful, but – at the same time – we women are strong. And we need to face it realizing that we CAN do it, instead of facing it with fear and wondering how we’ll get through (because then we’ve already set ourselves up for failure).
      Thank you for the wonderful comment, Samantha! It was VERY appreciated!!

  6. People are so insensitive! And I find a massive difference between nationalities, especially nationalities whose women are smaller than northern Europeans! Some of my colleagues have got awful comments about their size when they were 5-7 months pregnant. One student was particularly worried that she’d have to call an ambulance during class because my colleague looked as if she was going to give birth, she was so huge! She was 6 months gone at the time. Needless to say that didn’t go down well!

  7. The lady in the shoe store needs to be on meds!!! If it’s any comfort- I think she must have a very low low low pain tolerance. It’s pain you get through, not hold onto for 20 years. I love your answer to everything…bring on those cider donuts, you deserve them after all that!

    1. VERY good point, and that is something that came to my mind as I quickly left the shoe-store. All the moms I know tend to forget the pain of childbirth quite quickly, because they are so in love with their babies. (And they most certainly do not hang onto the memory of childbirth for 20 years).
      I think the woman was just downright miserable and wanted to bring someone else down with her. I can’t think of any other reason as to why someone would try to freak out a pregnant woman like that.

  8. My jaw just dropped to the floor at the acquaintance story, and then remained on the floor during that shoe store story. Wow, just wow. Yea, I’ve heard the gambit over the last five years as far as preggo stories. I’ve had women tell me that a C-section is the way to go, and the others tell me that a C-section was the worst thing possible. Same with natural – either with drugs or without. Every delivery is different. If you have a good doctor who listens to you and a husband and family who are there for you, you will be just fine….at least that’s the conclusion I’ve come to! As for people touching you, recently, I’ve been kissed a lot on the forehead and cheek by people praying for me. What do you do with that? I’ve gotta find a shirt somewhere that says “No touchie” before it’s too late!

    1. I must have a face that says, “Please touch me” or “please give me advice.” Ha, ha! I feel as though I’ve faced every awkward situation in the book during this pregnancy (although I haven’t had people kiss my cheek or forehead while praying for me yet… So hopefully I’ll at least avoid that. I mean, the prayers I’ll take! Ha, ha. But the awkard touching? Yeahhh, no thanks)! 😉 And I agree, every labor story is different, and – in the end – we women are strong; and – with a strong support system behind us – we will get through! (And ultimately, it will be SO worth it in the end)!! Definitely invest in a “don’t touch the bump” shirt. Ha, ha!! Whether or not they work, they’re a ton of fun. I want to make a shirt for my husband that says “Let go my Preggo…” Get it? It would be based on those old “Let go my Eggo” waffle commercials… but ‘preggo’ would just be substituted for ‘Eggo’. LOL!! 🙂

  9. O_O

    Oh. My. Goodness. People, seriously. I just don’t know what people are thinking sometimes. I have a friend who got so fed up with strangers (or even acquaintances) touching her belly without even asking that she started touching theirs back. Yeah, nobody likes that. When I read what you wrote about that lady sticking her finger INTO your belly button I literally felt the awkwardness from here. Oh my goodness, so weird.

    And the “it’s going to hurt” story… yeesh lady. It’s like when you’re engaged and people are like “Aww, congratulations. Did you know that xyz% of marriages end within the first year? Hope you’re ready!” Just let me focus on the good here. I’m pretty sure there aren’t many pregnant women in the States today who aren’t aware that at some point labor will come and it probably won’t be the most feel-good day of their life. But encourage them, for goodness sakes. If you have to say anything at all, toss out a “it’s worth it in the end” or something.

    Okay, off my soapbox. 😉 I’m glad you are surviving the awkwardness so far! If you do ever implode, I definitely look forward to hearing all about it. 😉

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